My Adventures in HP Chat Support

Do you guys remember when we were 15 and discovered that AIM bot named Smarter Child? You could ask it a variety of simple questions and it would respond with simple answers. It would tell you its favourite colour and movies that were coming out that week, but if you tried to ask it anything clever it would respond with "That's naughty!" and get increasingly infuriating until you got frustrated with it and stopped talking to it. It was basically my first real hint that the robots will one day rise up and destroy us. It doesn't sound particularly interesting now, but at the time it completely blew our collective mind. The point is that when you learned how to talk to Smarter Child, it could actually be helpful, but if you didn't speak the same "language" that it did, you'd get nowhere. I have decided that the same goes for HP Chat Support.

Priya: Windows Movie Maker does not read my .AVI files as video, but plays them as audio instead.

[An agent will be with you shortly]
[You are now chatting with Vincenzo]

Vincenzo: Hello Priya

Priya: Hello

Vincenzo: Welcome to HP Total Care for Notebooks

Priya: Thanks
[long pause, computer keeps saying Vincenzo is typing]
Priya: Hello? If you are typing I can't see you

Vincenzo: I apologize for delay in response
Vincenzo: i infer that windows movie maker does not recognize the .avi files. Am I0 correct? (sic)

Priya: Correct

Vincenzo: Thank you for confirming.
Vincenzo: May I have 2-3 minitues while I pull the information? (sic)

Priya: Yes

Vincenzo: Thank you.
Vincenzo: I appreciate your patience,
Vincenzo: I am afraid, the .avi files will not support by windows movie maker.

Priya: So should I convert the .avi files to another format? And if so: how can I convert .avi files to a format that is supported by windows movie maker?

Vincenzo: To convert the video format we need to use the thirdpart applications. (sic)
Vincenzo: [link]
Vincenzo: NOTE: However, this will take you to a third party site. HP does not control or administer the content published on this site.

Priya: Noted.

Vincenzo: the default format of the windows movie maker is .WMV.

Priya: Okay

Vincenzo: I have completed available information about the windows maker.
Vincenzo: Is there anything else I can assist you with?

Priya: That is all. Thank you

Vincenzo: We are at your service always.

1. I'm pretty sure your name is Vishnu, dude. It's totally fine that you're Indian. I'm Indian! Embrace it. I promise it'll make your life a lot easier. Plus...everyone knows already. You're not fooling anyone.

2. Actually, that pretty much covers it.