Hashtag Blessed, Basically

I blog less when I'm happy. A lot less. I think that's true of everyone, really. You're too busy experiencing the moment and spend a lot less time moaning about What Could Be when you're enjoying life. Also a lot of my day-to-day expression energy gets burned up on Twitter so you should be following me (@fairlyalarmed) if you're interested the more mundane updates. I kept a pen-and-paper journal in high school, college, all the way through to last year, and then stopped that and this page as well. I'm not the same KIND of happy as I was last year (that kind of unfettered glee is unsustainable and also probably a sign of mental unbalance in the long term), but I'm definitely more centered emotionally and...just...pleased about my life and myself than I've ever been. I've definitely had one of the best years of my life so far. This is different from other Best Years in that I've known it's the best as it's happening, a fact for which I'm thankful.

You'll notice my penchant for vague bullshit hasn't budged, however, hahahaha. Ummm...basically I took a year off between my MBA (from which I graduated last August after one of the most rewarding and fun semesters of my life) and law school, which I start in a couple months. I've been traveling, reading, working (a tiny bit), drinking (...more than a tiny bit), basically just trying to enjoy to the maximum the last period of my life where I can decide to go to Austin, NYC, San Francisco, or Vancouver (to name a few! I've been busy) on a whim because I have no responsibilities and am beholden to no one. Sounds charmed, right? It has certainly felt that way.

So. Law school in the fall! I'll be attending the UofH Law Center for the first year, at which point I'll consider transferring out of the city. I talked a lot about leaving Houston this year but I decided on UHLC for a lot of reasons, not just academic...my family needs me here this year due to some other events I might write about later. At first I was kind of irritated that I'm spending YET ANOTHER year here, especially since I'm already pretty sure I want to try and move back when it's time to Settle Down. In the end I've come around to the perspective that one year is a drop in the bucket (I mean, this last year went by pretty fast!), and my parents and I are already looking for apartments so that keeps me positive. After a dark period last year where I didn't know what to look forward to, having all this on the horizon, something concrete to move towards, is a kind of happiness unto itself.

Another thing that's made this year great is the fact that all this free time has given me the space to devote serious energy to my relationships and how I conduct myself within them. I've been thinking a lot about which people are important to me and why, and that's nice in that I don't feel so reactionary when stuff happens between another person and myself. Now when there's friction with someone I try to remember everything we've both invested in the relationship, and the fact that we have an ongoing bond to not fuck up by saying or doing dumb things. This is big for me because I've historically been very into Revenge and Teaching Lessons, which, in addition to being toxic for the soul, sometimes backfires in ways of which I am not a fan. I still get called "intimidating" by grown men sometimes but I'm trying to keep the outright thirst for blood in the professional/academic arenas of my life. I'm also trying to be more conscious about letting the small stuff slide which I'm aware is total cliche but get off me, I'm obviously extremely new to Zen Attitudes. I'm grateful that I got to use my time to make my friends' lives better this year, whether it's by traveling to support a friend going through a divorce, or reading about trans* issues at 4AM because it's impacting someone I know in a major way, or even something as simple and small as being free for happy hour when a friend had a particularly hard day. One old friend plans to have a baby this year and over dinner last week she told me she wants me in the delivery room! A new friend invited me to celebrate her birthday with her and a few other girls at a villa in Mexico in a couple of weeks and she's flying all of us out there IN A PRIVATE JET which I'm obviously psyched about. I'm also happy to say that I got to visit my grandparents and other family members a lot this year, and when things went bad in April I was privileged to say "I'll be there" no matter when, where, or for how long they needed me. That's something I can be proud of no matter what happens next.

I've lost weight, I dress better, and and feel healthier (mentally and physically) and more confident than ever, all without the help of hypnosis therapy! I don't really know how else to put this but I feel optimistic about the direction my life is taking! SEE THIS IS WHY I DIDN'T BLOG hahahaha positivity is so lame. Anyway, I think this post has fulfilled its purpose, which is: accomplishing something despite lazing around in bed all afternoon after attempting to take the edge off my hangover with Chik-Fil-A for breakfast (told you I'm having a good year). No promises about when I'm going to post next since I clearly can't be held to that but suffice it to say that for now I'm doing really well, I'm excited about the future, and I hope you are too. BREAK!

On Fire

SO many bloggable things have happened to me in the last few weeks I don't even know where to begin. The things is, they're all almost supernaturally positive things and I've just generally been on something that feels like an endorphin high for a few days straight at this point, like...to the extent that writing about it in a public space would be bragging. I keep coming here and starting all these effusive rainbow-drenched, hearts-over-all-the-i's posts and when I read it back even I can tell I sound like a drug addict. I can't do that shit right now. It would be rude.

Maybe another time though. Or you can text me and I'd be happy to write you an iPhone novella on the topic.

Oh yeah, I got an iPhone. I guess I can tell you that.

UPDATED: I just saw that this is pretty much just plagiarized from a post I wrote exactly a month ago. So. I guess no news is good news?

Anticipating 2012

God. I remember the post I made about being confused about what to "call" 2011. And now this! I'm never going to catch up. This year, I graduated from college, celebrated a lovely anniversary with Boyf, traveled a bit, made new friends, strengthened bonds with old ones, and started my MBA candidacy on the right foot...it was a big year for me and I'm so, so grateful to everyone who helped make it so.

To my readers, I hope 2011 was as good to you as it was to me - and I trust 2012 will be even better! I really can't wait to see what this year will bring.

Love,
-Priya

PS. SEE YOU NEXT YEAR! LOL

This is How.

You have to question a cinematic culture which preaches artistic expression, and yet would support a decision that is clearly a product of a patriarchy-dominant society, which tries to control how women are depicted on screen. The MPAA is okay supporting scenes that portray women in scenarios of sexual torture and violence for entertainment purposes, but they are trying to force us to look away from a scene that shows a woman in a sexual scenario, which is both complicit and complex. It’s misogynistic in nature to try and control a woman’s sexual presentation of self. I consider this an issue that is bigger than this film. … There is something very distorted about this reality that they’ve created, which is that it is OK to torture women on screen. Any kind of violence towards women in a sexual scenario is fine. But give a woman pleasure? No way. Not a chance. That’s pornography.

- Ryan Gosling 


Holy fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck

Too Bad.

I'm going to Starbucks, can I get you anything?
Ughhh sorry I'm late to class, was there something due today?
Oh, did I hurt your feelings when I made fun of you just then?



Too bad.

So good!

Oh god. If I had a dollar for every boner this video gave me, well...lunch would be on me. But I don't, so it isn't.

Back!

Yes, I was gone for a while there. First I went to Costa Rica with the Boyf, then I went to the Galapagos with my fam, THEN more family came into town and stayed for two weeks, and I never had more than a couple days between those three stretches of time. If you've ever traveled internationally twice in a month, you know that two days is enough time to catch your breath, do a load of laundry, pack again, throw a temper tantrum, and drive to the airport. So that accounts for all the days. Actually no it doesn't, because this week I started classes for my MBA program. So...there's that. Now that I'm re-entering society (which kind of feels like being a meteorite burning up in Earth's atmosphere but whatever), I see that Beyonce made me a present! I'm sharing it with you because I am nice like that.



Fuck, Beyonce, FINE!

This post sponsored by the committee to elect Beyonce for Empress of the United States.*

*Which is incidentally comprised only of the author of this post.

A Tale As Old As Time

Firefighters rescuing kittens. How classic can you get?



Also classic:

"WRONG ONE! Wrong one."
"Other hole."

But what I like best about this video is the fact that the whole group of manly firefighters breaks into nonstop crazy giggling at the sight of the kitten shooting out of the tube. Just unending cackles back and forth, forever.

Dating Advice From a Sex Worker

No, not me, you assholes! HER.

Anyway:

Complain about being fat. Seriously, men love reassuring women that they’re not fat. He may roll his eyes, but a man can tell you not to lose that booty, that you’re crazy, and that your thighs are juicy and he’ll feel as good about himself as he would after volunteering in a soup kitchen all day.

If you’re anorexic, sickly, or morbidly obese and this is not feasible, choose something else for him to reassure you over that is completely inconsequential. Act embarrassed about a broken nail or an invisible bruise. Don’t point out anything legitimate like your cystic acne. Start off all incredulous-like when he says that he still finds you attractive with only nine acrylics. Let him slowly convince you that you’re a beautiful woman. He’ll tell you all about how he doesn’t want those airbrushed models in the magazines with the ten nails that all look the same. Your relationship is only getting stronger.

That bit about "those airbrushed models in the magazines with the ten nails that all look the same" was my favourite. NAILS ARE OVERRATED. But I'm addicted to manicures anyway.

Scratch Everything

From now on I want to be Nicki Minaj in any outfit from this video. Mkay? Just choose one. HURRY UP! CHOOSE ONE! Not so easy, is it? They're all pretty rad. I'll just have to take ALL OF THEM! DADDYYY!!!!!!!

SCARY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This cat is going through some stuff and I totally get it.

Oh, good heavens. This is just delightful.

I'll just let it speak for itself.



Don't you just LOVE Oscar Wilde? Okay, who doesn't, obviously. But still. O Oscar, REANIMATE YOUR ROTTED CORPSE AND rescue me from the terrible obscenity of modern communication!

Baby Celebrity

LOOK AT THIS LIL GUY! Do you recognize him?

It's Nathan Fillion! IN JORTS AND ROLLERBLADES. LOLOLOL. All the LOLs. I kind of want to tweet it at @nathanfillion and heckle him a bit but I feel like that would be just incredibly unfair. Strangers don't heckle me about my senior yearbook picture, thank GOD. On the other hand I am this sexy FOR FREE and Nathan gets paid a lot to do what is (essentially) the same job. Wait where am I going with this...um...anyway, Nathan Fillion as a wee lad, and don't let his outfit make you feel like you know Canadians now, because you don't.

Oh my god upon further inspection I see that he is wearing WRIST GUARDS AND A FANNY PACK. lajfalkdjflakfja NATHAN! What is the meaning of this!

Oh man I think you're going to like this one!

1. It's a video
2. Of a baby penguin
3. ...Wait for it...
4. BEING TICKLED

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaa

oh my god. inject this into my eyeball. fill up my brains.

I laughed. Literally. The entire time this was playing.

I dunno! Something about all those kids shitting themselves in terror and/or delight just made me giggle.

One Thing I Love

is that my conversations with Devon more often than not can be just boiled down into the difference between men and women. See for yourself:

Devon: hahaha wow, i just got a groupon for half off a 24K gold collagen mask, shampoo and style, and 30-minute massage
does gold make it better?

me: hahahahahahaha NO
i mean
yes
but not really

And just earlier today we were talking about what makes lip gloss and lipstick different. Is this (SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! MAKEUP! SHOES! THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN SILK AND SATIN!!!) how he feels when I attempt to understand about engine components?

In Which Some Troubling Personality Defects Come to Light

I just took this personality test at the behest of my daily VSL email and this is my diagnosis:

Always happy in a crowd, you love to converse, to relate, and above all to have fun. You tend to think in a more holistic manner than many others. Like a crow you are attracted to shiny objects, new ideas, playful exciting colors and the thrill of a new personal relationship. You love to talk or gossip. You are highly invested in the reality of day-to-day life. Practicality is far more important than issues of honor or allegiance. You are a creature of the here and now. You are a natural multi-tasker, often switching mid-thought from one duty to another. You have a flair for presenting your personality in your work, and are known as a great storyteller and natural actor. You are very skilled at taking in a barrage of information and distilling what is most important from it. Naturally charming, you are quick to win new friends. Over stimulation is a danger.

Um...some of that is terrifyingly accurate for the kind of material that was covered; this is no OkCupid personality quiz, which is to say: I highly recommend taking this test if only to experience the sensation of staring at a star and a square in efforts to answer "Which of these shapes can control your mind?" If any of you know wtf was going on with that line of questioning, please get in touch and/or send me links to cray-cray psychological studies about shapes, colours, vibrations, and how they relate to the REVELATIONS OF THE SUBCONSCIOUS MIND!!!!!!

NATIONAL PUPPY DAY!

I mean, every day is National Puppy Day, but today it is OFFICIAL.



D'aaaawwwwwwwwwwwwww.

[Via]

My Heart Will Go On

My mom is listening to a Bollywood song from 1995 while she works out in the other room. Every Indian person I know knows this song, even if you have to hum the melody for them to remember it. Indian DJs know to have it in their arsenal at an Indian event - I'm positive I've heard it at literally every Indian wedding reception I've ever been to (since 1995), and I have been to A LOT of Indian wedding receptions. My mother has 40 cousins. FORTY!!!!!! Indians be...havin' babies.

This is weird for me to try to explain because the American equivalent would be to unironically listen to the theme from Titanic. Also, I get sick of songs if I hear them too often in a one-week span; this Bollywood song has passed that point and cycled around to whichever point it is that I actually have dreams wherein this song plays in the background and I don't even realize it until a week later. It doesn't even annoy me anymore. This song is no longer just the theme to a movie - it's the theme for a people. It's an anthem. For ladies who saw this movie. In 1995.



SIDE NOTE: I just read the Wikipedia article for this movie (I saw it when I was 10, come on) and hollyyyyy crap. It made me realize how Shakespearean a lot of these classic Bollywood flicks are - the comedies are mischievous and cute, until everything almost turns into a huge tragedy, and then everyone gets married, whereas the tragedies are like comedies (you know, sad comedies though), and they alllllmost turn out okay, until everyone DIES. My god. Heartstrings, consider yourselves plucked. I'm going to go eat lunch and think about organizing a Bollywood night wherein all my white friends GET SKOOLED (also: all my white friends watch me ugly cry because you guys srsly these movies are intense).