Hey I have a blog! I mean, everyone has a blog, even if you don't write in it I bet you have a blog somewhere. Even if you didn't set it up. It's a law. We must all have blogs. By 2015 there will be a Blog Committee and we will all be put in Instagram Jail if we don't shove our lattes and cats under other people's noses at least 5 times a day. Not to mention all the fucking babies. That is such a tired complaint but oh my god. Go tell a therapist about it if you need to talk about your kids that much. Talk about your kids, but more importantly, talk about your need to talk about your kids to the exclusion of everything else...that is an unfair remark. The moms I know are remarkably well-balanced and still quite fun, if not as social as my non-be-offsprung friends. Except for one, and she was reallyyyyyyyyyyyy dull to begin with. It was like the baby finally gave a differentiating facet to her personality, except for the fact that it's happened like 100 billion times already. Practically everyone does it. She shouldn't brag - when you think about it, the really smart people are the ones who don't have children. They're the ones with all the money and free time and will to live. Or the first two anyway. I KNOW that last paragraph is so done, so obvious, but I can't delete it. I want to delete it because of its STARK UNORIGINALITY but I just feel it a lot right now. I'm being true to myself by whining about Facebook Moms.
I have been watching an English show called Rev. on Hulu and it's really cute. It's about a hapless vicar who smokes and drinks and has problems but still strives to be good (actually aren't most British shows about hapless vicars who strive to be good? And they say Americans are obsessed with religion. Can you think of a SINGLE American sitcom about religion? Other than Seinfeld obviously). I relate to it because of my ongoing struggle to enhance my own Inner Beauty. Oh this is fortuitous! It's my first entry of the new year and I am talking about my resolutions. I resolved to develop my Inner Beauty again this year because it was so successful in 2012, and also because I am practically perfect in every other way and so couldn't think of anything else to formally resolve to do. I mean of course I resolve to lose weight and read more books but those are more perpetual resolutions...so perpetual as to be almost Sisyphean...
I remember in 1995, I was in 5th grade. I calculated how old I would be in 2000, the new century. I would be 14. I wished I had been born in 1985 so I'd be 15, a nice round number. In the end it wouldn't have mattered because whatever year I was born in, I'd still be the same rambling twat I am now, and I blame that on my parents. The 80s were a bad choice. They should have waited to have me until the 90s. I'd be much younger now and the so-called Millenials are much less self-aware of their insufferability so I would have less crippling self-hatred. But I would also be a much worse person, in terms of quality, so I guess we can leave it the way it is now.
I just deleted a passive-aggressive part about how I blow-dried my hair all nice for Boyf yesterday but he didn't really seem to notice! So the Inner Beauty thing is working. Although now I'm telling you about it so :(
Did you guys hear the new David Bowie song?
Makes me want to hear what a back-from-retirement Talking Heads would sound like.
Okay that's enough for a whole post right? I think it is, especially since the last one was so serious and this one is so full of bullshit. Too much contrast. Maybe I'll resolve to write in here more often!
I have been watching an English show called Rev. on Hulu and it's really cute. It's about a hapless vicar who smokes and drinks and has problems but still strives to be good (actually aren't most British shows about hapless vicars who strive to be good? And they say Americans are obsessed with religion. Can you think of a SINGLE American sitcom about religion? Other than Seinfeld obviously). I relate to it because of my ongoing struggle to enhance my own Inner Beauty. Oh this is fortuitous! It's my first entry of the new year and I am talking about my resolutions. I resolved to develop my Inner Beauty again this year because it was so successful in 2012, and also because I am practically perfect in every other way and so couldn't think of anything else to formally resolve to do. I mean of course I resolve to lose weight and read more books but those are more perpetual resolutions...so perpetual as to be almost Sisyphean...
I remember in 1995, I was in 5th grade. I calculated how old I would be in 2000, the new century. I would be 14. I wished I had been born in 1985 so I'd be 15, a nice round number. In the end it wouldn't have mattered because whatever year I was born in, I'd still be the same rambling twat I am now, and I blame that on my parents. The 80s were a bad choice. They should have waited to have me until the 90s. I'd be much younger now and the so-called Millenials are much less self-aware of their insufferability so I would have less crippling self-hatred. But I would also be a much worse person, in terms of quality, so I guess we can leave it the way it is now.
I just deleted a passive-aggressive part about how I blow-dried my hair all nice for Boyf yesterday but he didn't really seem to notice! So the Inner Beauty thing is working. Although now I'm telling you about it so :(
Did you guys hear the new David Bowie song?
Makes me want to hear what a back-from-retirement Talking Heads would sound like.
Okay that's enough for a whole post right? I think it is, especially since the last one was so serious and this one is so full of bullshit. Too much contrast. Maybe I'll resolve to write in here more often!
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